ChiefScalyNipples
Dictator of my bedroom
Author's Note: Now before I get a bootyfluff of comments saying "ZOMG U VANDALIZE TEH FORUMZ!!1one!" it says "Comedy Fan-Fic" so it's supposed to be funny and not serious. Oh and if you've never watched the show Beavis and Butthead, you'll probably not get the jokes in this.
Episode 1: Amulet of Mara
Our heroes, Beevus and Butt-Head, are two dorky teenage Argonians that think they're cool. Beevus has yellow scaled skin with horns on the top of his head that curve like hooks and his lower jaw is larger than his upper jaw. Butt-Head has a head covered with brown feathers and no horns and has 4 sharp fang-like teeth hanging from his upper lip and has peach colored scales with squinty eyes. The story takes place in Riften at their house, Honeyside.
Butt-Head: Uh huh huh huh, Hey Beevus, check it out *pulls out an Amulet of Mara from a bag he has next to him and shows it to Beevus*.
Beevus: Woah, heh, how'd you get that, heh heh.
Butt-Head: I got it from that black guy at the temple of Mara, uh huh huh. He said that if you wear it, you can score any chick you want. Uh huh huh huh.
Beevus: Heh heh, what is it like a...like a pimp chain or something?
Butt-Head: No, uh huh huh, dumbass. It's the artifact of the spirit lady of love or something. Uh huh huh, it's said if you wear it around your neck than she'll bestow the power of scoring upon you. Uh huh huh
Beevus: Heh heh, YEAH! We're finally gonna score! I'm gonna get a turn to wear it right?! Heh heh
Butt-Head: Yeah after me you greedy bunghole, uh huh huh huh.
Beevus: Ok lets go to Whiterun, that's where all the chicks are. Heh heh
So then our heroes left their house and proceeded to the Riften Stables and payed a man in a carriage to take them to Whiterun. Until the strong man picked both of them up and threw them out for annoying him.
Butt-Head: Hey we want our septims back, butthole! Uh huh huh huh
Beevus: What an asswipe! Heh heh
Butt-Head: It's all your fault Beevus, if you didn't ask that guy about how to get ancient Daedric porn scrolls we would have still been on there. Uh huh huh
Beevus: Shut up Butt-Head. Heh heh heh, I was curious!
Butt-Head: Whatever, lets just walk it's not that far away. Uh huh huh.
And so they did, our heroes walked all the way to Whiterun. When they got through the gate they were exhausted, holding on to their knees with their hands bending over. Until they feasted their eyes upon a beautiful young Nord woman named Ysolda.
Butt-Head: Uh huh huh. She's hot *puts on the amulet of Mara and starts walking towards her ahead of Beevus*
Beevus: Heh heh yeah... *realizes Butt-Head is gonna get to her first* Hey, wait!
Butt-Head: *to Ysolda* Uh huh huh, hey baby... I like, have the amulet of Mara 'n stuff, uh huh huh.
Beevus: Dammit Butt-Head! She's mine!
Beevus then tackles Butt-Head and they start fighting, breaking the amulet of Mara in the process.
Ysolda: Guys?
Their still fighting
Ysolda: Guys...
Still fighting
Ysolda: GUYS!
She finally grabs their attention and they stop fighting for a moment
Ysolda: I'm already taken by some other random guy with the Amulet of Mara.
Ysolda's boyfriend appears out of nowhere. He's a muscular, Jersey Shore Tanned guy wearing sunglasses and a full set of Iron Armor.
Dovahkiin: Hey sexy! *Slaps Ysolda's ass* Who are these two nerds?!
Butt-Head: Uhh sir, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to kick your ass. Uh huh huh
Dovahkiin: FUS RO DAH!
The powerful shout blew Beevus and Butt-Head both all the way back to Riften.
Dovahkiin: Come on baby, lets have sex while I bench press two dragons!
Ysolda: *Giggles and follows the Dragonborn back to his house in Whiterun, Breezehome*
Meanwhile, in Riften...
Beevus: Damn it! We didn't score! Heh heh
Butt-Head: I know, I hate that butt-monkey that blew us away. uh huh huh.
Episode 2 will come when I get some feedback. I hope you enjoyed this.
Episode 1: Amulet of Mara
Our heroes, Beevus and Butt-Head, are two dorky teenage Argonians that think they're cool. Beevus has yellow scaled skin with horns on the top of his head that curve like hooks and his lower jaw is larger than his upper jaw. Butt-Head has a head covered with brown feathers and no horns and has 4 sharp fang-like teeth hanging from his upper lip and has peach colored scales with squinty eyes. The story takes place in Riften at their house, Honeyside.
Butt-Head: Uh huh huh huh, Hey Beevus, check it out *pulls out an Amulet of Mara from a bag he has next to him and shows it to Beevus*.
Beevus: Woah, heh, how'd you get that, heh heh.
Butt-Head: I got it from that black guy at the temple of Mara, uh huh huh. He said that if you wear it, you can score any chick you want. Uh huh huh huh.
Beevus: Heh heh, what is it like a...like a pimp chain or something?
Butt-Head: No, uh huh huh, dumbass. It's the artifact of the spirit lady of love or something. Uh huh huh, it's said if you wear it around your neck than she'll bestow the power of scoring upon you. Uh huh huh
Beevus: Heh heh, YEAH! We're finally gonna score! I'm gonna get a turn to wear it right?! Heh heh
Butt-Head: Yeah after me you greedy bunghole, uh huh huh huh.
Beevus: Ok lets go to Whiterun, that's where all the chicks are. Heh heh
So then our heroes left their house and proceeded to the Riften Stables and payed a man in a carriage to take them to Whiterun. Until the strong man picked both of them up and threw them out for annoying him.
Butt-Head: Hey we want our septims back, butthole! Uh huh huh huh
Beevus: What an asswipe! Heh heh
Butt-Head: It's all your fault Beevus, if you didn't ask that guy about how to get ancient Daedric porn scrolls we would have still been on there. Uh huh huh
Beevus: Shut up Butt-Head. Heh heh heh, I was curious!
Butt-Head: Whatever, lets just walk it's not that far away. Uh huh huh.
And so they did, our heroes walked all the way to Whiterun. When they got through the gate they were exhausted, holding on to their knees with their hands bending over. Until they feasted their eyes upon a beautiful young Nord woman named Ysolda.
Butt-Head: Uh huh huh. She's hot *puts on the amulet of Mara and starts walking towards her ahead of Beevus*
Beevus: Heh heh yeah... *realizes Butt-Head is gonna get to her first* Hey, wait!
Butt-Head: *to Ysolda* Uh huh huh, hey baby... I like, have the amulet of Mara 'n stuff, uh huh huh.
Beevus: Dammit Butt-Head! She's mine!
Beevus then tackles Butt-Head and they start fighting, breaking the amulet of Mara in the process.
Ysolda: Guys?
Their still fighting
Ysolda: Guys...
Still fighting
Ysolda: GUYS!
She finally grabs their attention and they stop fighting for a moment
Ysolda: I'm already taken by some other random guy with the Amulet of Mara.
Ysolda's boyfriend appears out of nowhere. He's a muscular, Jersey Shore Tanned guy wearing sunglasses and a full set of Iron Armor.
Dovahkiin: Hey sexy! *Slaps Ysolda's ass* Who are these two nerds?!
Butt-Head: Uhh sir, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to kick your ass. Uh huh huh
Dovahkiin: FUS RO DAH!
The powerful shout blew Beevus and Butt-Head both all the way back to Riften.
Dovahkiin: Come on baby, lets have sex while I bench press two dragons!
Ysolda: *Giggles and follows the Dragonborn back to his house in Whiterun, Breezehome*
Meanwhile, in Riften...
Beevus: Damn it! We didn't score! Heh heh
Butt-Head: I know, I hate that butt-monkey that blew us away. uh huh huh.
Episode 2 will come when I get some feedback. I hope you enjoyed this.