Your WTF/LOL Moments?
- Thread starter Erqiosk
- Start date
Zoblazo
Ur nan`s h0usecarl
The other day I was bored in Whiterun so I decided to attack Mila Valentina and thinking the guards would attack me they started attacking Mila instead????? And no matter how many time we hit her she wouldn't die. I loaded the same save again and tried again to see if it happened again but it didn't ?.?
And every time I enter my breezehome there;'s a skeever chilling by the fireplace like...just standing there...and every time I kill it and re-enter my breezehome it respawns. I'm convinced it's one of my children because I had two and one is missing :'(.
Also, every time I enter my breezehome my husband Farkas draws his weapon and chases me and when he catches me he opens dialogue with "Hello my dear" and if I leave the house he follows me.
The same thing happened with Hadvar every time I entered Whiterun a while ago.
Now here in the forum an old post I deleted keeps showing up every time I post anything to ANY thread.
*sigh
And every time I enter my breezehome there;'s a skeever chilling by the fireplace like...just standing there...and every time I kill it and re-enter my breezehome it respawns. I'm convinced it's one of my children because I had two and one is missing :'(.
Also, every time I enter my breezehome my husband Farkas draws his weapon and chases me and when he catches me he opens dialogue with "Hello my dear" and if I leave the house he follows me.
The same thing happened with Hadvar every time I entered Whiterun a while ago.
Now here in the forum an old post I deleted keeps showing up every time I post anything to ANY thread.
*sigh
Last edited:
Daelon DuLac
How do you backstab a Dragon?
1) Well - since children are basically rats anyhow, I'd get used to the skeever. Probably eats less and won't ask you for allowance. (Personally I like my pet skeevers in the basement of my Hearthfire homes). And for goodness sake! Stop killing it! What did it ever do to you. Another possiblity is, if one of your children was a boy - this was his pet and has, for some reason been coded as respawning.
2) I've had exactly the same experience with both Hadvar and Farkas. It's annoying, but I've never found a fix for it, although, in Farkas' case, I was able to think it by paying off a 0 (zero) bounty in Falkreath and he quit it. I think, with Hadvar, it has something to do with the war. I found that, once I complete the questline all the way through, he goes back to Riverwood and hangs out at the Sleeping Giant all the time.
3) As to your stamina, it sounds like, somehow you got the Vampire-Daytime glitch or has some disease. Have you checked both? If you drink a bunch of stamina potions, does it go back up again? I haven't experienced that glitch, but I have had the opposite glitch where my stamina never goes down. Now that's a glitch I can live with.
Zoblazo
Ur nan`s h0usecarl
1- Lmao! I'm not gonna lie, you have a good point there.
2- Every time I TRY to kill Farkas he just "faints" and no matter how many times I hit him he doesn't die :'(
3- YES I HAVE THE FAMPIRE-DAYTIME GLITCH, it's ridiculous, like every time I walk out into the sun it's like "The bright daylight makes your vampire blood boil" or w.e and I'm like I'M A WEREWOLF!
Daelon DuLac
How do you backstab a Dragon?
Why would you want to kill Farkas? Sure he's a dumb lug, but he's loveable. Vilkas on the other hand...
1- Lmao! I'm not gonna lie, you have a good point there.
2- Every time I TRY to kill Farkas he just "faints" and no matter how many times I hit him he doesn't die :'(
3- YES I HAVE THE FAMPIRE-DAYTIME GLITCH, it's ridiculous, like every time I walk out into the sun it's like "The bright daylight makes your vampire blood boil" or w.e and I'm like I'M A WEREWOLF!
As to the Vampire Glitch - have you checked if you have both skill trees? That would be cool! I know there's a glitch where you can get both if you're on console, but I've only been able to achieve it once. It has something to do with Aela I think. On the other hand, why would you want to be a big, hairy Vampire Lord that attracts fleas. It might just be confusing.
Zoblazo
Ur nan`s h0usecarl
Why would you want to kill Farkas? Sure he's a dumb lug, but he's loveable. Vilkas on the other hand...
1- Lmao! I'm not gonna lie, you have a good point there.
2- Every time I TRY to kill Farkas he just "faints" and no matter how many times I hit him he doesn't die :'(
3- YES I HAVE THE FAMPIRE-DAYTIME GLITCH, it's ridiculous, like every time I walk out into the sun it's like "The bright daylight makes your vampire blood boil" or w.e and I'm like I'M A WEREWOLF!
As to the Vampire Glitch - have you checked if you have both skill trees? That would be cool! I know there's a glitch where you can get both if you're on console, but I've only been able to achieve it once. It has something to do with Aela I think. On the other hand, why would you want to be a big, hairy Vampire Lord that attracts fleas. It might just be confusing.
I mean I only wanted to kill him because he wouldn't stop following me and it was getting pretty annoying so I was like hey, why not kill him
And, I mean it'd be pretty cool if I could transform into a vampire lord, but I can't
Everything just looks like I smoked pot for a few seconds.
Daelon DuLac
How do you backstab a Dragon?
Check to see if there's a bounty anywhere for you. Particularly if you pissed of a guard. The Companions (including Farkas) are affiliated with the Guards Union apparently. I usually find one in Falkreath for some reason - even it's a zero balance one.Why would you want to kill Farkas? Sure he's a dumb lug, but he's loveable. Vilkas on the other hand...1- Lmao! I'm not gonna lie, you have a good point there.
2- Every time I TRY to kill Farkas he just "faints" and no matter how many times I hit him he doesn't die :'(
3- YES I HAVE THE FAMPIRE-DAYTIME GLITCH, it's ridiculous, like every time I walk out into the sun it's like "The bright daylight makes your vampire blood boil" or w.e and I'm like I'M A WEREWOLF!
As to the Vampire Glitch - have you checked if you have both skill trees? That would be cool! I know there's a glitch where you can get both if you're on console, but I've only been able to achieve it once. It has something to do with Aela I think. On the other hand, why would you want to be a big, hairy Vampire Lord that attracts fleas. It might just be confusing.
I mean I only wanted to kill him because he wouldn't stop following me and it was getting pretty annoying so I was like hey, why not kill him
And, I mean it'd be pretty cool if I could transform into a vampire lord, but I can't
BTW - you must get some really good pot then. Live in Washington State eh?
(a joke, they just made it legal and, living in Portland, we now have the impression that EVERYONE is stoned, all the time up there - especially since you can have your pot delivered with your pizza!).
Zoblazo
Ur nan`s h0usecarl
Check to see if there's a bounty anywhere for you. Particularly if you pissed of a guard. The Companions (including Farkas) are affiliated with the Guards Union apparently. I usually find one in Falkreath for some reason - even it's a zero balance one.Why would you want to kill Farkas? Sure he's a dumb lug, but he's loveable. Vilkas on the other hand...
As to the Vampire Glitch - have you checked if you have both skill trees? That would be cool! I know there's a glitch where you can get both if you're on console, but I've only been able to achieve it once. It has something to do with Aela I think. On the other hand, why would you want to be a big, hairy Vampire Lord that attracts fleas. It might just be confusing.
I mean I only wanted to kill him because he wouldn't stop following me and it was getting pretty annoying so I was like hey, why not kill him
And, I mean it'd be pretty cool if I could transform into a vampire lord, but I can't
BTW - you must get some really good pot then. Live in Washington State eh?
I checked but nope, nothing, this is going to make me cry. It's so difficult to withdraw my valuables from my chest in Breezehome :'( There's going to be a HUGE bounty after I take my anger out on the city though
LOL nah, I live in CT
I don't smoke though, I'm a good girl *cue halo
ecozombie
Loki
So unfortunately Mjoll is still glitching out on me. I found out I had a few different bounties out and paid all of them off except for the one in Winterhold for 4 septims which even the guard said he didn't have time for, thinking that would fix her glitching out (one was in The Rift so). No such luck. I entered Lakeview Manor last night to a parody of glitches as well. My bard was standing on a dining room chair playing the lute. As soon as I talked to him he got down but that one was funny. I found Mjoll standing in the corner of the bedroom, trying to blend in with the wall. I stare at her for a good five seconds, and all she says is "Yes dear?". So I have her follow me which gets her out of the corner, but the glitches only get worse. As I'm unloading a few things at Lakeview before we head out, she decides to follow the bards example and stand on the chair. I'm like wtf for a minute then ignore it, no harm done. I look back to see Mjoll literally bouncing up and down on the chair repeatedly while standing on it. I go into command mode and have her sit on the damn chair instead of bouncing on it. This seemed to fix the glitches at Lakeview.
Thinking maybe the house is making her like this I decide to take her away from it for a while. I had just gotten the quest for being able to use Master level Alteration spells and could've used the help, so I took her along. Bad idea. About five times during the journey there and in the dungeon itself, she pulls out her hunting bow and starts screaming and shooting at nothing, scaring the crap outta me the first few times until I see there are no red dots around. Then half way through the dungeon she starts walking away. Turns out she had left me as a follower and so I had to trigger that again. That's happened before as well. Starting to get really frustrated with Mjoll's glitches but I will admit they were amusing at the time.
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Thinking maybe the house is making her like this I decide to take her away from it for a while. I had just gotten the quest for being able to use Master level Alteration spells and could've used the help, so I took her along. Bad idea. About five times during the journey there and in the dungeon itself, she pulls out her hunting bow and starts screaming and shooting at nothing, scaring the crap outta me the first few times until I see there are no red dots around. Then half way through the dungeon she starts walking away. Turns out she had left me as a follower and so I had to trigger that again. That's happened before as well. Starting to get really frustrated with Mjoll's glitches but I will admit they were amusing at the time.
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Daelon DuLac
How do you backstab a Dragon?
Okay - now I have to take Mjoll as a follower. Never have. Of course, as this is my first Master playthrough and am doing dead is dead, I have to make it out of Helgen first. Maybe the 10th try is the charm.
ecozombie
Loki
Well good luck. I hope she doesn't glitch out on you like she is for me. :/ I will say its worth the hassle as she's one tough chick, which would be a good thing to have on a Master/DOD play through. And I gotta admit that though the glitches are a little annoying, they are quite amusing.
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Wippii
Bookworm
Wacky physics, part #4469283894:
I sneak-shot (with an arrow) one of the bandits at the tower near Bleak Falls Barrow, and the corpse was catapulted off into the distance. I watched it fly over my head - almost literally - and disappear behind cliffs. I never found the corpse, even though I searched the area pretty thoroughly. I also tried using the tfc 1 console command, but still couldn't find the bandit. All I did find was the wolf that I'd killed a few minutes earlier.
(Un)fortunately my game crashed soon thereafter when I hit my save hotkey, so I got to kill the bandits (and the wolf) again. No wacky physics that time.
I sneak-shot (with an arrow) one of the bandits at the tower near Bleak Falls Barrow, and the corpse was catapulted off into the distance. I watched it fly over my head - almost literally - and disappear behind cliffs. I never found the corpse, even though I searched the area pretty thoroughly. I also tried using the tfc 1 console command, but still couldn't find the bandit. All I did find was the wolf that I'd killed a few minutes earlier.
(Un)fortunately my game crashed soon thereafter when I hit my save hotkey, so I got to kill the bandits (and the wolf) again. No wacky physics that time.
Rhew
The missing snow elf
So a few glitches has been making me laugh or get mad recently. I'm pretty sure it's something to do with the ultimate follower overhaul mod I've added.
Sometimes after a fight Belrand will just stand there with his sword unsheathed and his other hand ready to cast whatever magic he uses. I can't talk to him or anything. I just leave him there and eventually he'll fix himself and catch up to me.
Another is when I tell Faendal to relax, he'll start staggering around and swaying when standing as if he's drunk. Even when I tell him it's time to go he'll continue to sway and stagger around the house following me. It's pretty entertaining. The only way to stop this is to get a load screen. And I've only had this happen to Faendal.
The other glitch is also with Faendal and is quite annoying. He'll randomly become unresponsive. I can't click on him. He's commentary will stop (I have the follower commentary overhaul mod too), he doesn't attack enemies, the enemies don't even respond to him. I've tried attacking him. It hurts him but he doesn't move. He only follows. The only way I've found to fix this glitch is by loading an earlier save. (since I'm not using fast travel in this playthrough that can be really far back....)
Sometimes after a fight Belrand will just stand there with his sword unsheathed and his other hand ready to cast whatever magic he uses. I can't talk to him or anything. I just leave him there and eventually he'll fix himself and catch up to me.
Another is when I tell Faendal to relax, he'll start staggering around and swaying when standing as if he's drunk. Even when I tell him it's time to go he'll continue to sway and stagger around the house following me. It's pretty entertaining. The only way to stop this is to get a load screen. And I've only had this happen to Faendal.
The other glitch is also with Faendal and is quite annoying. He'll randomly become unresponsive. I can't click on him. He's commentary will stop (I have the follower commentary overhaul mod too), he doesn't attack enemies, the enemies don't even respond to him. I've tried attacking him. It hurts him but he doesn't move. He only follows. The only way I've found to fix this glitch is by loading an earlier save. (since I'm not using fast travel in this playthrough that can be really far back....)
Wippii
Bookworm
So I started yet another new character (or rather restarted my character again), and everything went smoothly until we emerged from the keep/cave.
At some point between the "tutorial bear" and the bandit outside Embershard Ralof's confidence dropped to 0, so he fled from every enemy. The Bandit Thug I maybe could have understood, but not a single wolf.
*a wolf on the opposite side of the river turns hostile*
Ralof: "I cannot best you!" *runs away*
Me:
Reloading a save I'd made inside the keep fixed the problem; "getav confidence" returned 4 when used on everyone's favourite Stormcloak. No idea what caused the glitch, but I've gotta admit it was hilarious.
At some point between the "tutorial bear" and the bandit outside Embershard Ralof's confidence dropped to 0, so he fled from every enemy. The Bandit Thug I maybe could have understood, but not a single wolf.
*a wolf on the opposite side of the river turns hostile*
Ralof: "I cannot best you!" *runs away*
Me:
Reloading a save I'd made inside the keep fixed the problem; "getav confidence" returned 4 when used on everyone's favourite Stormcloak. No idea what caused the glitch, but I've gotta admit it was hilarious.
FullmetalHeart20
Well-Known Member
Two moments here;
1. When I first became a vampire lord, I immediately wanted to see the Dawnguard react. It was the wee hours of the night when I stalked through their castle, rousing them from sleep. They reacted with predictable horror and revulsion, with the occasional show of concern that admittedly tugged at my still heartstrings. For the most part, though, I laughed it all off as the sentiments of mortal fools. Then I got to Isran. Here was a man who sleeps with a war hammer strapped to his back, telling me with simple contempt to get out of his castle, not even viewing this fledgling vampire as a matter worth getting out of bed for. I meekly complied.
2. I was on a hunt for elf blood. I needed but two more common samples before moving on to the Falmer, and the book of fate would be mine. It was late at night, so I decided to go on a bit of a blood binge at Half Moon Keep. To my joy, there was a Bosmer and Dunmer each. No sooner had I slaughtered the weaklings and made off with my prize, then I fell into that pit of spikes near the old iron mine and met my end! The next time I fell for the same nefarious trap, but used the magic of fast travel to escape my lot. Unfortunately, fate's design had other plans and the loading screen froze .
So there's the sad tale of this immortal. And no matter what happens, no mention shall be made of my death at the hands of some lowly bandit archers! Well, after this.
1. When I first became a vampire lord, I immediately wanted to see the Dawnguard react. It was the wee hours of the night when I stalked through their castle, rousing them from sleep. They reacted with predictable horror and revulsion, with the occasional show of concern that admittedly tugged at my still heartstrings. For the most part, though, I laughed it all off as the sentiments of mortal fools. Then I got to Isran. Here was a man who sleeps with a war hammer strapped to his back, telling me with simple contempt to get out of his castle, not even viewing this fledgling vampire as a matter worth getting out of bed for. I meekly complied.
2. I was on a hunt for elf blood. I needed but two more common samples before moving on to the Falmer, and the book of fate would be mine. It was late at night, so I decided to go on a bit of a blood binge at Half Moon Keep. To my joy, there was a Bosmer and Dunmer each. No sooner had I slaughtered the weaklings and made off with my prize, then I fell into that pit of spikes near the old iron mine and met my end
! The next time I fell for the same nefarious trap, but used the magic of fast travel to escape my lot. Unfortunately, fate's design had other plans and the loading screen froze .So there's the sad tale of this immortal. And no matter what happens, no mention shall be made of my death at the hands of some lowly bandit archers
! Well, after this.
raido KASAI
Ansei Master Badass
So I started yet another new character (or rather restarted my character again), and everything went smoothly until we emerged from the keep/cave.
At some point between the "tutorial bear" and the bandit outside Embershard Ralof's confidence dropped to 0, so he fled from every enemy. The Bandit Thug I maybe could have understood, but not a single wolf.
*a wolf on the opposite side of the river turns hostile*
Ralof: "I cannot best you!" *runs away*
Me:
Reloading a save I'd made inside the keep fixed the problem; "getav confidence" returned 4 when used on everyone's favourite Stormcloak. No idea what caused the glitch, but I've gotta admit it was hilarious.
...
And his liver removed and his bowls unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burnt off
And his penis split and his....
That's, that's enough music for now lads
Wippii
Bookworm
^ I have no idea what you're quoting there. And I'm too lazy to google it.
TIL that casting Courage on deer/elk/rabbits/foxes turns them hostile.
Are they secretly plotting against humankind, only lacking the courage to attack?
Also, a dragon was slain while I was far away, quite possibly in an entirely different cell. Today, as I returned to where it had been fighting a small army of Stormcloaks, I randomly absorbed a dragon soul. No corpse or skeleton was to be found (I flew around in free camera mode).
I reloaded a few times in an attempt to see where the soul came from, but it didn't appear to be coming from any direction. I have a mod that disables the music associated with dragon soul absorb and Word of Power learn, so the experience was kind of creepy, not seeing a dragon anywhere.
TIL that casting Courage on deer/elk/rabbits/foxes turns them hostile.
Are they secretly plotting against humankind, only lacking the courage to attack?
Also, a dragon was slain while I was far away, quite possibly in an entirely different cell. Today, as I returned to where it had been fighting a small army of Stormcloaks, I randomly absorbed a dragon soul. No corpse or skeleton was to be found (I flew around in free camera mode).
I reloaded a few times in an attempt to see where the soul came from, but it didn't appear to be coming from any direction. I have a mod that disables the music associated with dragon soul absorb and Word of Power learn, so the experience was kind of creepy, not seeing a dragon anywhere.
raido KASAI
Ansei Master Badass
ecozombie
Loki
I knew that was Monty Python but couldn't remember which movie it was from! Thank you for refreshing my memory. I love Monty Python.
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Ooshie_Mama
Mercenary and Assassin
Once I thought it would be funny to anger the grey beards..... They just kept turning me into ice, and then punching me constantly.... I finally managed to run out the front door, so I jumped down the steps (as I always do) and in mid air, I get blasted down the mountain in ice form. As i'm falling for a good 15 seconds, i'm thinking, "I'm so dead, I'm so dead, I'm so dead." Then, BAM! I smack into the ground, with my limbs stretching out and coming back, much like I was made out of rubber. Then I lay there for a few more seconds, and stand up completely unharmed, and walked off like nothing even happened. But in those moments of me falling, I had realized that I haven't saved for over 2 hours. Needless to say, I saved just about instantly...
