Corrupted Wish!

[ChiefScalyNipples]

Granted, but you can no longer breathe air. Meaning you'll have to spend the rest of your life in water.

I wish I was actually reptilian in real life

 

[SynnerLarkie]

^^granted but you get stepped on within 5 minutes of said transformation

I wish i had an ass like the green chic in my avatar.

 

[dunklunk]

Granted, and sorry, but I'm not about to corrupt that one.

I wish hulkie had an ass like her avatar. (for her husband, of course)

 

[King o' the Britains]

Granted, but her husband takes an arrow to the knee and has to sleep in the guard barracks.
I wish for a turtle that breathes fire.

 

[dunklunk]

Granted, but inhaling also has dire consequences, thus burning the turtle to a crisp.

I wish I had a pet jaguar.

 

[i K33L n0085]

Granted, but it eats you.

I wish I had a pet dragon.

 

[dunklunk]

Granted, and just what do you seriously think I'm gonna say about your pet dragon?

I wish, as a trained pet, I had the love child of a goldfish and a slaughterfish.

 

[SynnerLarkie]

^^granted but it kills himself because it is so confused on what it is.

I wish i could wake up at my goal weight.

 

[King o' the Britains]

Granted, but you cant stop eating.
I wish the Green Bay Packers would win all their games, the playoffs, and the superbowl.

 

[dunklunk]

Granted, but the Green Bay Packers have been relegated to Group C of the Madrid Futbol League.

I wish that money really did grow on trees. (now why would anyone corrupt this one?)

 

[i K33L n0085]

Granted, but the money is counterfeit.

I wish I could grant my own wishes.

 

[Buffington Battle-Born]

Granted, but the money is counterfeit.

I wish I could grant my own wishes.

They all have flaws because you weren't specific enough when you wished them.

I wish that Bane from the Dark Knight Rises wouldn't sound like Gandalf in a Darth Vader helmet doing a pl*psty Sean Connery impression.

 

[Svarnor]

Granted, but instead he sounds like Gandalf in a Darth Vader helmet doing a really good Sean Connery impression.
I wish I could think of a good wish.

 

[Buffington Battle-Born]

You get your idea for a wish, but you immediately forget it.

I wish that I could have the powers of the Dragonborn

 

[Svarnor]

Granted, but Alduin comes and you fail to defeat him
I wish I had an awesome name like 'Buffington Battle-Born'

 

[Buffington Battle-Born]

You get the name of Crapmuncher McKevin, which is considered awesome by stupid people.

I wish that I could use Console Commands on Skyrim for the Xbox 360, so I could finally get Daedric armor.

 

[Svarnor]

You get a console command-using bug (believe me, I play on PC, they happen a LOT) and are stuck in noclip mode.
I wish I had Awesomenauts on Steam. It just looks... Awesome

 

[Exelex]

Granted, it's so awesome that it permanently crashes your computer system.

I wish that I was an Elder Scrolls deity.

 

[theoperation]

Granted, it's so awesome that it permanently crashes your computer system.

I wish that I was an Elder Scrolls deity.

Granted, but you're Talos so no-one is allowed to worship you anymore.

I wish I had a six-pack of Honningbrew Mead!

 

[SynnerLarkie]

Granted but it turns out it is non-alcoholic.

I wish my back would stop hurting.