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Spoiler The Divine Trials of Badas*ery

Discussion in 'General Skyrim Discussion' started by The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass, Feb 20, 2014.

  1. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    First, you must find a coven of vampires(or any vampire), and withstand their attacks for 180 seconds, healing yourself to the best of your abilities. You must contract their vile disease, and resist the urge to feed. You must also keep the vampire which infected you alive. You are not to feed on anyone during this challenge.

    Then, once you are at the final stages, you are to pray at least once at the shrine of every aedra and daedra that possesses them to receive each of their blessings at least once. You must choose a follower to wait at the final shrine for you.

    Then, and only then, are you to seek out a dragon and be cleansed in its fire, not resisting the purifying flames as you sustain yourself using your restoration magic. You will meditate on the true meaning of hardship and bada*sery as you are saturated by the verbal abuse of the children of Akatosh.

    Once you have that understanding, you are to use your wards to approach the dragon as it is breathing fire upon you, in a bada*s manner, calmly walking up to it. Then, PUNCH THAT AS*HOLE THE FACE FOR THE NAMES HE CALLED YOU! Once, you've done that, do whatever you wish to the dragon. If you are able, you are to ride it, as you have put it in its place.

    No matter what you choose to do, you must acquire a black soul gem, and use it to capture the soul of the vampire that changed you. You must kill it in the most badas* fashion possible, preferably with a one handed finishing move execution while they are one knee, or an unarmed finishing move.

    Then you must use its soul to cure yourself of vampirism, and go to meditate with the greybeards for a time. There, you will grow a glorious beard of your own (use the face sculpture in Riften to simulate it), and go get your follower.

    Once you have grown a mighty beard, you will find the Ebony Warrior, and have a follower fight him to a knee, and then completely restore his health! You must do this three times. Your follower is not to fall to a knee at any point in the battle(excluding being Fus Ro Dahed).
     
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  2. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    That was my first thought. Why do I foresee one of those ridiculous "trying on clothes" montages that for some stupid reason end up in just about every dumb movie?
     
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  3. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    I wanted to use Ysgramor's soup spoon but I can't attack with it
     
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  4. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    Then a conjuration challenge you shall have!

    Also, Sky, are shields allowed in that challenge, maybe a hide shield? I was unable to do it without the ability to stagger the dragon (Yes, I have gone man to dovah with a legendary dragon and won. Also, PREPARE TO GET ATE SO MUCH). Pretty much impossible without some way to stagger the dragon or Become Ethereal.
     
  5. Skyrimosity

    Skyrimosity Fine Southern Gentleman

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    I leave the challenge up to you, Noble Sir Gidian, and all aspects of it are to be decided by you. I must not have the dissenters think I biased the challenge in my favor.
     
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  6. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    I was inquiring after your Legendary Dragon Slaying challenge. But I promise, I am not going to spare you any hardship for this one.
     
  7. Skyrimosity

    Skyrimosity Fine Southern Gentleman

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    Oh, my Enemy of Dragons Challenge?

    Shields require the use of a hand, so as long as the shield is unenchanted then it is allowed. Because it requires the usage of a hand, I do not necessarily define a shield as armor.
     
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  8. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    First, you must find two desired champions. You will kill one, dead thrall them, and lead them to the other. Upon meeting, they must fight to the death! Winner takes all!

    Then, you will use every skill at your disposal (without using any cheating or broken mechanics) to turn him into the most badas* and formidable fighter you possibly can. Your champion must be as perfect a killing machine as you are capable of creating. They may have an acceptable amount of healing and stamina potions, no more than ten of each. The goal is to have them defeat their opponents with as little use of them as possible.

    Once they are ready, you must have them carve a path of destruction across Skyrim, slaying any who resist you in the holds, such as guards, on their own. Without your help. Once you clear the holds of Skyrim, and they know to fear your mighty creation, you must hunt bigger game.

    They must be capable of slaying dragons by their lonesome. But, you must have the dragonrend shout to keep the fight on the ground, as if the dragon flies around it can get difficult to measure what your tool of destruction is really capable of. If you have not yet fought Alduin atop the Throat of the World, have your thrall fight him there as well.

    Once that is done, it becomes time for you to put your creation to the ultimate tests against more humanoid adversaries. They must slay adversaries like the General wielding the Champion's Mallet in a fort on Solsteim. They must slay Kaarstag. And they must slay the Ebony Warrior.

    You are allowed multiple tries for the stronger opponents, though you get more points if your thrall can slay them in one go.


    I also inform you that I myself will be joining you for this challenge! I am getting Skyrim ready as we speak!
     
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  9. Irishman

    Irishman Well-Endowed Member

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    That conjuration challenge sounds awesome Gidian! My Altmer is only level 31 at the moment but he is a master conjurer. Once he has leveled up he will definitely take on this challange.

    A Lv48 Volkihor Vampire will do the trick methinks :cool:
     
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  10. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    That was my exact first thought while I was writing that. However, I have a surprise in mind.
     
  11. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    I have no characters, as I cleared out my saves long ago. This will be my first time back on Skyrim in over half a year. This is going to take me awhile...
     
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  12. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    I will be full on RPing to the best of my abilities.
     
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  13. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    Does 50+ dragons with nothing but an unenchanted sword, emperor robes and cuffed boots count? I think my PC should get in itself too because my twin 7900 series radeons pulled off rendering 20+ dragons in the air at a time on ultra settings and still kept a 30+ fps while doing video capture and taking 1 sec interval screenshots..

    I'm going through video and screenshots now.. Should be some interesting images. The video capture was nearly 36GB and that was me doing it at half-size for file size considerations.

    I'll just say the legendary dragon thing is damn near impossible. With no armor or defense of any kind, you either get flung to your death or lethally smacked with the tail the first time it touches down. Tried about 20 times but no dice, even dropping down to master level.
     
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  14. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    To add to the above, the 50+ dragons thing was on legendary skill level.

    There was a mix of dragons up to but not including legendary dragons.
     
  15. The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass

    The Honorable Gidian Diva of Sass Sahrot Vahlok Spaan. Bahnahgaar. Minion #88!
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    In order to take a Legend on Legendary, you must make a very specific build for it. LOTS of points in hp, and you have to be able to cast some VERY good alteration magic. If you can do that, and make so that he doesn't get automatic finishing move with bite attacks, you can kill one without taking a point of damage. The only problem, they deal MASSIVE amounts of damage...
     
  16. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    And to add for the case of my PC getting inducted, I forgot to mention that it was pushing output to my triple monitor setup.

    Surprised as hell it didn't CTD considering how crappy Skyrim manages RAM usage
     
  17. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    It could technically be done w/o magic, but it's a hit and run dynamic where you get one good swing on it and then have to sprint away. I got him down to about 70% before I trapped myself against a rock and he flung me.
     
  18. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    that's just a random 2 minutes somewhere in the middle of it. This was a pretty quick and dirty compression, lower framerate and lesser resolution output so it would render quickly. I'll piece together something more detailed and post it too. I'll have some screenshots in a short bit too.

    [edit]

     
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  19. raido KASAI

    raido KASAI Ansei Master Badass

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    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Take that you so-called "legendary" sonuvabitch.

    Now you are just a "dead" sonuvabitch.
     
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    Gidian: 14 Points (BADASS! You are now a Master!) Feb 22, 2014
  20. GrumpyBadger

    GrumpyBadger Article Writer

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    well, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuudge :D +10pts to whoever gets that easteregg!

    guess I'm not using Broc. lol. He's a werewolf, and cannot be turned. Looks appropriate enough for my battlemage though. She practices the art of restoration as well. :D her growing a beard will be a trick... but consider it done! :D
     
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