I shed crocodile tears Not even sad when they appear Then a daydream of a movie, I acted and directed A beautiful scene, beyond what was expected They killed my characters wife They killed my wife I spoke to the butcher expected to let him know The dark seeds of violence that he did sow But then it turned real soliloquy spoken Mind revealing what was hidden from me Because it wasn’t the characters family that died Instead it was mine, a child unnamed and wife unsaved I was at work yet I let them flow I thought I hid them good, so no one knew Yet I realized the crocodile tears turned true Why? Why did I see you? It struck me out of the blue You! You! It had to be you! My heart’s fire died like a small lantern in a flood I saw us, how happy we were Even though up to this point we never were I’m still not ready to say I love you Yet suddenly in my head I was screaming I do The very thought of being close to you Yearning to feel some of your love to I want to be the reason for your smile Yet I lie to myself that it is tears of a crocodile In this Daydream of a Daydream That was so real, to real it seems I could hold you, console you, make all right And the you were dead in my arms The warmth became a void No just empty but draining inside Inside my heart it tried to spread So I tried to change it and it was me instead So I was six feet under, soul asunder I would demand eternity in hell no mater my good Because that is what I deserved for leaving you Because even now you are better than a dream Inability to reach out to you is breaking my hearts strings I hold it in until I can truly call out to you But I know this may be a delusion too But this void is not dying And the only warmth seems to be thoughts of you I think I love you, but know I shouldn’t That all I want and need is you, but I can’t For without you, in my arms I feel like nothing You are nothing, yet are my everything A beautiful void feeding what is in my heart I feared these feelings and tried to fight it But like these tears at work they slip through No sobbing, just longing Tears of a crocodile streaming down my face The idea they could be anything more terrifies me.