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100 Restoration Guide

Discussion in 'Skyrim Guides and Tutorials' started by ChiefScalyNipples, Jun 24, 2012.

  1. ChiefScalyNipples

    ChiefScalyNipples Dictator of my bedroom

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    What's up readers I'm going to show you how to get 100 Restoration fast. It's pretty simple, in fact about as easy as 1, 2, 3 if you have passed preschool. Oh and dont take this entire thing serious, I do joke around a bit in the thread.

    STEP 1: ACQUIRE EQUILIBRIUM
    You have to get this spell tome and read all the pornographic images within it to study the actual, sexual, way of casting this magic. It is not sold by any trader or vendor anywhere and it's only located in one place, and that place would be Labyrinthian, so that means you'll probably have to become a proud member of Hogwarts and get far enough in it's questline to get this pile of paper and pile words written on the paper. Or if you're a rebellious little fluffer, you can just go in there without the quest, I'm not sure if that will work though, but fluff the polic...i mean guards. Whenever you're in Labyrinthian and you've made some progess you'll find a room with a gentleman who exploded all over the Enchanting table and near that table you'll find the book. Oh and you can still get it if you already done the Hogwarts questline if you missed it. The spell converts 25 health into 25 magicka per second. It also is a way for mages to commit suicide for being bullied in Skyrim, so be careful not to kill yourself, unless thats what you want.

    STEP 2: ACQUIRE GRAND HEALING (or any healing spell)
    Now if you're a man like me and don't like paying for your products, you can get a whole anusload of healing spells from this lady named Alessandra in Riften's Hall of the Dead. Yeah, you'll have to sit through her bitching and whining about how kids used to pick on her for being a necrophiliac, but its worth it in the end. She'll ask you to take a dagger to her dad or uncle or adopted inbred grandpa or some plops who goes by the name of Andurs. She asks you because the bitch is too lazy to fast travel and do it herself. This gentleman Andurs is located in Whiterun's Hall of the Dead (necrophilism runs in the family). So give the guy his dagger, go back to Riften and there ya go, this woman overloads your man-purse with healing spell books. So read all of those encyclopedias until you find one that heals you the most (probably Grand Healing). Or if you already have healing spells, use one of those, but unfortunately I informed you of this ability too late.

    STEP 3: EQUILIBRIUM IN ONE HAND AND HEALING IN THE OTHER.
    Now use both of the spells at the same time and be careful not to kill yourself. Just keep holding down both of the buttons that cast both spells until you reach 100 Restoration or whatever the desired level should be.

    STEP 4: PROFIT
    Well there ya go. You got 100 restoration and you also learned how to save yourself from suicide from casting those two spells along the way. Isn't mommy proud? I think she is, she told me in bed last night.



    Side Note: Take into effect that restoration magic does not heal as good as rubbing your ass cheeks with I can't believe its not butter
     
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    Duon: 1 Point Jun 24, 2012
  2. Bumblebee Jones

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    LMAO this is hilarious and helpful!
     
  3. Duon

    Duon Graphic Designer

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    Good guide and rather funny. :)

    +rep

    Side Note: You can also do this through the thieves guild line, on the pilgrims path during "darkness restored" you step off the path into the light for a second and u instantly get zapped down to like 5 health, step into the darkness heal yourself wash rinse repeat. This method is very fast but can only be used once due to the pilgrims path closing after the quest, is still helpful for those players whom often do the thieves guild early on though.
     
  4. Get Sm0ked

    Get Sm0ked Alea Iacta Est

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    R u jkin people give this "guide" rep? in fairness you comment and on all the guides you see then you come to mine but its the usual bullsht advice that ervy1 always alredy knows then you give my guides that acshally help people nutn. jesus..
     
  5. Get Sm0ked

    Get Sm0ked Alea Iacta Est

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    Could not read a sentence without knowing what you meant...
     
  6. Duon

    Duon Graphic Designer

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    I add advice to guides were i can just like it suggests within "The Guide on Guide Making", most the exploits and power leveling techniques you post have been on youtube sense shortly after game launch just like this one. Simply spread the knowledge us older players know to those just starting to play and be happy. :p

    Plus I already +rep'd one of your posts this week and cant again till i rep 5 other people; just giving the guy some encouragement to keep writing, everybody has something useful to offer. :)
     
  7. Get Sm0ked

    Get Sm0ked Alea Iacta Est

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    u didnt rep, but fair enough
     
  8. ChiefScalyNipples

    ChiefScalyNipples Dictator of my bedroom

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    How are you going to give me the "bad grammar" rep, look at yours... -_-
     
  9. Get Sm0ked

    Get Sm0ked Alea Iacta Est

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    I undid it.
     

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