Poetry

mad props solace, that was awesome, I'd be interested in hearing more of that one if there is more.

Not gonna post anything tonight, too tired and my brain is shutting down, but I'll have something tommorow.

I'll second what Rednek said Solace

thanks, and since I'm jamming right now here's another one:

Weakened

take me down
let me go another way
it's over now
this dead end road leads the way

away

and I can't save you
I can't do this on my own
and I can't breathe now
I am weakened, let me go

you've become more human
you will die with mortal sin
as you follow in my shadow
as your eyes
see, for me
I can't breathe in this
time to lead as you go
follow
away
away

and I can save you
I can do this on my own
and I can breathe now
Still I'm weakened, let me go

I am the one who's incomplete
I have no room for my retreat
I'll follow you until the end
One day I will see you again

I'm going to read this at The Belfast heat of the All Ireland Poetry slam... Oh dear (imaginary construct) it is all falling apart now.

- - - - - - - - - -


Because Geraldine asked me to

What on Earth is a hallowed tongue?
It sounds like a porno with Nuns and fellatio
Sounds like a hint to me and yes you may
It says in here pause for embarrassed moment
Okay so this is what choking looks like
You may now talk amongst yourselves.

- - - - - - - - - - -

Guess who isn't winning this year? Again

Everything feels so empty
Damn it, I'm worthless
I could end it all, so tempting
There is nothing more for me
All it takes is one bullet, then I'll be free
Just a bullet away
The bullet that signifies the end of my day
I just want to make it all go away....


That was my second poem. I feel it was much better than my first. Also, it would much appreciated if you gave me your opinion. Criticism is welcome, as long as it's constructive. Hope you like it!

Solace that was impressive, I'm not very musically inclined, but I can almost hear it being a song
Dale, if you go out and read it, you win because you contributed.... metaphorically, I am in no way saying that just contributing wins the competition because that would defy the logic of competition. Good Luck anyways
Khajiit, umm..... I can appreciate it as poetry, but anything alluding to suicide really rubs me the wrong way, can anyone in the thread give me an assist with the critique? Cuz I really shouldn't try to.

I'm still having a hard time with the more creative side of myself, but here's somethin I wrote awhile back

Shades of gray

When people speak about good and evil
They don't realize that they're bein deceitful
It's not as simple as black and white
There's not much difference between wrong and right
There wouldn't be darkness without the light
Would we realize the day without the night?
I guess what I'm tryin to say
Is that black and white are just shades of gray

It's shorter than alot of my stuff, but it's one of my personal favorites. As always, criticism is appreciated and I hope you all enjoy the wonderfullness of poetry.

Freedom in Prison

Where will I be, after years, in this uncharted sea of life
Who all will be my friends & what all my passions
What will remain of this world I see today
What painful memories will remain blurred
What image will time mould in me
What will be love’s language
In that unknown shore of time;

The sun will come out once the storm is over
The same love will remain
Which has followed me life after life,
Freedom of love has made me a prisoner of hope
And it is just for your love,
I am born again as a poet
To fill blank pages of a forlorn past,
My love for you is a torn page
Which floats in the idle breeze,
Though the dainty flower has withered away
My garden will bloom again;

Why do I keep writing like this about my love alone?
Why do I keep loving you, like this?
This love will cease to exist
If fulfilled in a single lifespan.

As I think of our friendship, I begin to see
Mere words can't describe what you mean to me.
When this cold, hard world has me lonesome and blue
I look up to see my angel, my sweet angel, you.

You dry the tears that fall from my eyes.
You bring me sunshine to brighten my sky.
You rescue me when I'm scared and alone
And take my hand to lead me home.

No matter the miles that keep us apart
We're always together in each other's hearts
Sometimes we take for granted, I fear,
The ones who are so close and dear.

We get so caught up in life and things we must do
Sometimes we forget to stop and say I love you.
If ever you felt I forgot or didn't care
Let me stop right now, my true feelings I'll share.

You're the sun in my sky, the bed where I lie.
You're the home where I'm safe, the field where I play.
You're everything I am, everything I do.
So what I am saying is I LOVE YOU!

This isn't a poem, but rather lyrics to an as of yet untitled song we started working on. Thought I'd post it here anyways! It has a breezy surf-rock vibe to it, and slightly wistful/melancholy undertones in spite of the sunny context. Once I had written the lyrics, I realized it sounded like a dying song, but it's not meant to be that morose. It's gonna be awesome once it's finished, complete with steeldrums, ukuleles, laid-back acoustic guitars and of course lots of guitar slides

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Life's a beach and then you dive
I'll see you on the other side
We'll meet the surf when the sun is high
kick back on the sand 'neath a wide blue sky

I can almost see it now, it's a perfect setting
I'm welcomed by beautiful women
They greet me with arms open wide
then lead me to a place where the ocean sighs

The roar grows loud, the breeze grows strong
ukuleles are playing my song
somewhere beyond the edge of this world
where the ships sail never to return

Broken Dreams

As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend.
I brought my broken dreams to God
Because He was my Friend.

But then instead of leaving Him
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
With ways that were my own.

At last I snatched the back and cried,
"How could You be so slow"-
"My child," He said,
"What could I do? You never did let go."

^That was beautiful. Right on Mr. Search Engine, right on.

My bf assures me that I cannot post the entirety of my favorite poem in this thread however it starts out something like this....

There once was a man from Nantucket...

Thats really all he'll let me post sorry

Hi guys! It's great to see that there are lots of poem lovers out here. If it's okay i will share to you the poem i wrote a while ago. It's still untitled. If you can suggest any good titles for it i would be very happy. Here it is guys:

I'll have to share some when I get my computer back, I have a whole lot of em. More rhythmical and contemporary with the wording though, not sure how people feel about some swearing in their poetry lol. I really only right about the human experience and emotions. I typically write from my PoV but with a enough distance for people to feel it and be able to place themselves in the situations/relate to it.

Not the happiest poem, but meh, those were dark times.

Drowning

Sunken.. submerged. Suffocated by the cold.
Beneath a thousand leagues of water
Catatonic numbness overwhelming
So far down the light reaches me no longer

A murky silence, yet motion surrounds me
But I can neither see nor feel
All my senses deprived, the world fades to black
The darkness swallows
And asphyxiation follows

Gasping for air, desperate inhalation
My lungs are burned by the influx of water!
Panic ensues while my last breath is used
There is no time
To reconcile

A watery burial forced upon me
The sand shall be my deathbed
My dying throes multiplied in intensity
Death's cold gaze piercing me relentlessly

This is just an excerpt of a poem (mine tend to be long, I really only write when I get that urge and I have lines popping into my head all times of the day but I need that spark to really blow a poem up, whether it be a love, anger, sad, etc poem) I wrote a lil while ago during going through the feelings of a failed engagement. Without getting too much into the back story it was an example of lies, manipulation, and cheating on her part. I wasn't perfect but my issues were mainly in my most honest moment stuff like thinking too much... I can see why that would upset someone but after quite some time of TRYING TO PATCH IT UP after I caught her double timing and giving her another chance cus we were engaged I'm sure most would understand why I was a bit... introspective about everything in that relationship.This was me "writing it off" (part of it at least):

"I dont write poems I write obituaries
of the times and situations that weigh so heavy on me
yeah I stopped to smell the roses then I planted em on the grave
save the finger pointing now, you know everything I gave
so who you getting moody with, I aint your man
save that pl*ps for someone who truly gives a damn
you played the game and came up short, you rolled the dice and lost
so dont get mad at the devil you dared when you knew the cost
just another case of a girl lost, tryna play with peoples feelings
ignoring the cost the piper will call for as a result of all your dealings
wanna get Rowdy? well than call me Roddy Piper
cus I paid the dues and I made it through with no adviser
while I was freezing and alone and for you I made time
you picked up busy partying and fed me some lines
bout how you cant talk right now "My phone is dying"
didnt even ask how plops here was, so an ending is what I'm eying
you stopped caring along time ago, don't start with the stories
I dont care anymore those tales are in the excuses categories
you couldnt do this, you cant do that
you never tried never fought and this is where we're at
and to everyone else on that BS, don't think I forgot about you
cus the truth is you're expendable too"

Castle Of Poets

The castle is a place where poets dwell,
Where each can cast their wondrous spell.
From the turrets high to the dungeons deep
From each portcullis to the central keep.

Its powerful walls keep foes at bay.
They keep us safe from day to day.
The knights are brave and fight with zeal.
In armored suits and swords of steel...

The poets live as all men should.
Side by side in brotherhood.
The magic of rhyme is all they seek
From modern tongue to ancient Greek.

The castle echoes with the sound of joy,
And haunting words from man and boy.
The maidens fair who live within
Pen words of love and carnal sin.

For each one here there is a place
To release the soul from its inner space.
With words of mirth and sorrow both.
And witches spells of evil oath.

The castle grows from day to day
And people come from far away.
But once inside these walls of grey,
They know that they are here to stay.

Their words are all that leave this place,
Their souls the castle shall embrace.
So in our quest for perfect poem
We call this place our sonnets home.

What's with the amazing Necromancy? I mean seriously it seems that all the threads that I loved and left dead are being resurected. That being said, thank you for reviving this thread, hopefully it stays alive this time.

Drifting

Eyes wide open to another day
blinded by dawn's first liquid gold rays
I'm wondering just how I came to be
so disconnected from reality

I know where I came from but I don't know where I'm going
I'm wired but I'm tired, my lifeblood's not flowing
this flight's getting choppy and the wheels came off my wagon
I hate to admit it I'm a sparrow not a dragon
and as I gaze up I see
the stars at night no longer smile on me
and why would they, because they know when
I smile back it's a pretentious grin

if I made a change and found my way
sailed this ship through the straight of storms
into moonlit waters 'neath the cloudless darkness
that shapes itself into a million forms
of what my life could be

Perhaps then I would be free

Now I find myself praying
I could be someone else
somewhere at a distance, far from here
A part of me is gone, orbiting strange moons
the rest will burn up in the stratosphere

If I were to dream a dream of solitude,
I would always be at ease.
To feel something at such a great magnitude
Would make the dream almost a tease.

If I were to dream a dream of solitude,
I would never feel confined.
To feel so much self-fortitude
Would make me feel defined.

If I were to dream a dream of solitude,
I would know it was right on cue.
To feel the certitude
Would make it all come true.

Kind sir, take a bow.
Leave that smile on your face
Because I know now,
That if I were to dream of a place
Fitting for the solitude I speak,
I know I'd dream of you,
And think of your kiss on my cheek,
Crisp as the morning's dew.