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Lady Redpool the Unlifer

Pyro, Spirits Connoisseur, and Soulless Anarchist
I nearly cut myself last night...

I just had this pair of scissors in my hands after using them, and I just stared at them, then at the blades... and just thought about opening them up and sliding them across my wrist. I ended up shoving them back into my pencil case, where I couldn't see them... but I'm still shaking from it, even now...

Sounds like me after I've been around some of my addict friends. Good job sneak, that's a hard thing to do. Especially if it's that close. I'm proud of you man, you have more willpower than I.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
This is a vent and rage from me more towards myself...

I don't see this when I read through this thread, but sometimes in real life, like in person, or on facebook and twitter - I'll hear people talking or posting like really really personal stuff about themselves. I almost immediately believe that what they're saying is a complete fabrication or just a plain lie, and they're just trying to get attention.

My thought process when I make this conclusion is, why do people just randomly start talking about themselves on such a personal level, to people in real life that you barely know and aren't your family. One of my friends at work (whose the same age as me) was taking care of a customer, who happened to be a girl the same age as us, and all of a sudden after he finished her order (we work at Dunkin' Donuts) I don't know how it led to that, but she started talking about how she hates her parents and how she like hates her life... and I immediately think that this girl is performing some wierd method to pick my friend up or something...

And on Facebook especially, I feel like people post these personal statuses and forget that hundreds of people will see what they just posted... Or that they know what they're saying but are willing to sacrifice their personal privacy for a couple of likes and some motivational comments from others. Just attention in general.

Half of me feels like what I believe is true, and that I'm beating the system because I'm the only one picking it up, and the other half of me thinks I'm a scumbag because these people are actually hurting. Though I've never really understood expressing your hurt to people you barely know, I don't understand how that helps. I'm cold.
 

Doctor Langstrom

I want to be FEARED!
This is a vent and rage from me more towards myself...

I don't see this when I read through this thread, but sometimes in real life, like in person, or on facebook and twitter - I'll hear people talking or posting like really really personal stuff about themselves. I almost immediately believe that what they're saying is a complete fabrication or just a plain lie, and they're just trying to get attention.

My thought process when I make this conclusion is, why do people just randomly start talking about themselves on such a personal level, to people in real life that you barely know and aren't your family. One of my friends at work (whose the same age as me) was taking care of a customer, who happened to be a girl the same age as us, and all of a sudden after he finished her order (we work at Dunkin' Donuts) I don't know how it led to that, but she started talking about how she hates her parents and how she like hates her life... and I immediately think that this girl is performing some wierd method to pick my friend up or something...

And on Facebook especially, I feel like people post these personal statuses and forget that hundreds of people will see what they just posted... Or that they know what they're saying but are willing to sacrifice their personal privacy for a couple of likes and some motivational comments from others. Just attention in general.

Half of me feels like what I believe is true, and that I'm beating the system because I'm the only one picking it up, and the other half of me thinks I'm a scumbag because these people are actually hurting. Though I've never really understood expressing your hurt to people you barely know, I don't understand how that helps. I'm cold.


I know where you are coming from. I'm a person who bottles up my emotions, there are very few people who I trust to confide in with regards to my darker moments. Sure, I'll come on the internet and complain about work or some asshole who cut me off while driving, but that's as far as it's going to go. I might make a comment that I'm feeling down and depressed, but I won't go deeper into it. Only with my close circle of friends and girlfriend. That's it. So, like you, when I see people complaining about their family or this or that to random strangers, I see it as attention grabbing. Basically a pity party on the internet.

Of course I'm cynical and cruel at times. But, I've been told I'm an excellent judge of character, so even someone I just met...I can tell if they are attention whores. The pat me on the back and tell me I'm awesome type. Makes me glad I don't have Facebook, I know I'd hate the people on there.
 

kyleekay

Well-Known Member
I hate being in debt to my parents.

Since my (soon to be ex) husband and I split up in February, I've been living at home and paying them $300/month towards my debt to them. My ex won't help me with it. All I want to do is get them paid off so I can save up to have my own place for the first time in my adult life. It makes me feel overly dependent, and I hate having rules and "chores" that I have to abide by while I'm at home. I respect their guidelines of course, but for goodness sake... I moved out when I was 19, I've been married, I work full time, I'm nearly 23 years old, etc. I just want to feel like a "real" adult again. Gah.

Hopefully I will have them paid off by the end of this year so I can work towards renting a house for myself and my two dogs. Fingers crossed.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
I hate when Girls put the "All guys are careless scumbags" label on every guy.

The problem is that a high volume of Girls seem to be attracted to the Guys who might be attractive, yes - but don't have a care in the world for anything other than themselves. This applies to how they treat Girls, their Family, School, and anything else they don't find to be worthy of their attention, and will instead focus on what they want, which can vary on a spectrum that stretches from Video Games, to Partying with their Friends, and of course to mindless sex.

A lot of the times it may seem that Girls want to take Guys like these just to 'change' them - as if for sport. Well, go ahead and do it if you find it entertaining, just don't go complaining about how all Guys are terrible when you realize you've wasted a good chunk of time trying to change the traits and attitude of a person and it turns out they are not willing to change, as one would expect.

Going back to the 'Care' spectrum - Yes, I can agree that we men are animals. We find things we enjoy and we enjoy it as much as possible. Mindless Sex is always the big one that gets slapped on us, because emotion and passion are simply not needed for satisfaction in most men, most of the time Guys will have coitus (I'm watching Big Bang Theory while writing this!) with just about any girl, whether they've known them for 5 years or 5 hours. It is because of this, that most of the time Guys will look out for the Girls that look 'easy' as in 'easy to sleep with.' Guys who like mindless sex will take the girls that look the easiest, so they don't waste time not having sex and actually have sex. Typical criteria to look out for when finding 'easy' girls means incredibly high skirts, booty shorts, shirts showing excessive amounts of cleavage, etc. Of course, you girls look at your outfit and may go "I look so cute." To guys, it's a sign that you want it. Come on now, Girls - don't act stupid. You're the first ones to rant about how Guys are selfish animals and pigs, you know what we want, so why are you teasing? You're playing games, whether you know it or not - so Pro Tip: Dress classy if you want to find nice guys. Just some more food for thought. I'm not pointing any fingers, but take a look in the mirror and see if that is perhaps your problem.

Seriously. There's like, 6 Billion people in the world. If you come to these outrageous conclusions after complaining... You're sending the wrong signals to the wrong men.

Girls - I'm sure right now, whether you know it or not - there is a guy thinking about you. Not in the creepy stalker way, but in the "I would do anything and everything with you, I would love you like no other. I would rather do the most boring thing with you rather than doing what I think to be the most entertaining thing alone."

I know, because these are the thoughts going through my head as I listen to this girl I work with venting to me and a couple of others about her Boyfriend troubles of "Him not responding to my texts because he's with his friends." I immediately had a crush on this girl the day I met her, my second crush ever (the first one being in Middle School, so definitely the most serious feelings I've ever had). I refuse to be friend-zoned, and I continue to drop hints about my feelings for her, but she continues to put up with this Guy who could care less about her. I don't even get what she sees, he's a complete loser. We all work at Dunkin' Donuts, he's like 20 and doesn't go to school, this is like his full-time job, and she's working part time as she goes to school like me. He smells like fish and he mumbles to the point where he sentences are almost incoherent, and he's lazy. And it pains me to find another Girl who truly believes that all guys are scumbags, because the ones that are scumbags ruin it for us Good Guys.

Just some food for thought.

/end rant
 

kyleekay

Well-Known Member
Well said. Only thing I was iffy on was your commentary on how girls dress. People should be able to wear whatever they want, and only be judged on who they actually are. Of course, that'd be in an ideal world.

Wanna ditch your crush and date me instead? :p

Best of luck with her, but be cautious not to spend too much time chasing. I've seen that end badly for my male friends before.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
Well said. Only thing I was iffy on was your commentary on how girls dress. People should be able to wear whatever they want, and only be judged on who they actually are. Of course, that'd be in an ideal world.

Of course, people have the right to wear what they want. Though you can agree with me that some fashion styles are way more provocative than others. To the point where it's obvious they aren't just wearing it 'because it's cute'. I witness it first hand all the time. A group of girls drinking their Caramel Iced-Coffees and talking rather loudly about how all guys are selfish assholes. Meanwhile they're all wearing the jean short-shorts with the bottoms of their asses hanging out of the shorts. My commentary was a little harsh but that's how most guys look at it. You're never going to hear a guy say, "Wow that girl's yoga pants look so cute on her, and they look really comfortable." No, more like, "Look at the ass on that thing." and "Thank God for Yoga Pants."

Wanna ditch your crush and date me instead? :p

And as far as ditching the 6'0" Basketball-playing Angel with Irish-pale skin, long, flowing brown hair, freckles, and deep blue eyes that make you forget where you are if you stare at them too long, I think I'll have to respectfully decline on that one :) . I need my girls a little older for the guaranteed maturity, but I think our age gap is a little too big, you and I - as beautiful and as nice as you are. You'll find someone. ;) But please don't mind me as I drool over your excellent use of grammar and way of words in all of your posts.

Best of luck with her, but be cautious not to spend too much time chasing. I've seen that end badly for my male friends before.

Oh I won't be :p.
 

Lady Imp

Rabid Wolverine
I would just like to take this moment to say....I specifically wear yoga pants for the simple fact that it makes men drool. Okay, there is more to it than that, they are comfy and let's face it, I'm getting increasingly uncomfortable, but I will be the first person to tell you that when I go out in something revealing, my main purpose is to make men drool. As much as I would love for the world to be this utopian society, where men and women are completely equal and people can say and do whatever they want without eliciting a negative response from someone, the fact of the matter is that such a society does not yet exist. In theory, people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be judged, but humans are a species dependent on dominance, and they will pick anything they can to stomp someone down. And sometimes, that's their wardrobe. Hopefully, we will soon be able to get past this as a society.


In the meantime, whistle at me all you want....I'm wearing fuzzy yellow pants with puppy dogs on them right now and chowing down on a bag of creamy dill pickle potato chips. Dead sexy. :)

(It's kinda dawned on me that that post was a tad all over the place...I just got home from work, and I'm all woooooooooooo....)
 

kyleekay

Well-Known Member
Damn, shot down yet again! ;)

I agree, Imp. I've worked hard on my booty, and so help me God, I'm going to show it off now and again. :p Like you said though, on the rare occasion that I dress proactively I know what type of attention I'm going to pull in. Which is why I'm conservative most of the time.

Sorry for my short replies, I'm on my phone.
 

Lady Imp

Rabid Wolverine
But see that's just it though. Nothing angers me more than when a woman goes out with her cleavage all super duper out and then she complains that people are doing nothing than staring at her tits. I'm sorry, but for starters, breasts are just positioned at that front-and-centre place that catches the eye. Second, when someone walks up to me with what looks like Santa's asscrack hanging out the neckline of their shirt, then yeah, imma stare. However, I do think that the line should be drawn at a double-take and a desperate attempt to try to find something else to look at other than for little elves escaping the cleavage suffocation bearing gifts of candy canes and cookies. Do I think a comment is appropriate? Hell no. Is any sort of physical contact appropriate? Absolutely not. I can sit there and think "holy hell" all day long, but as anyone in law enforcement will tell you, thoughts and actions are two completely different things.
 

Simus

An Excellent Site Member
I really hope things work out for you Gun, and you Keely. I don't think they will for me. I've got a girl on my mind myself and I really like spending time with her and everybody else at Friday Night Magic. I don't want to be friend-zoned but It'll turn to crap if I try anything else. It always does. The only girl I've ever been with was a week of unbelievable happiness and months of miserable long-distance and a breakup-sparked depression that got worse by the month. She was insane and I was too puppy-eyed to see it. I've never forgiven myself for being so blind and that was four years ago. Any other love interests I've had have been unrequited and with girls I no longer speak to as a result. I'm 24 years old, I did 5 years of college and I've never had a real, stable, steady girl. I don't know what it means to be in a relationship and I've never had sex. I don't even have a job and I'll never be able to drive without a new pair of eyes. There are nights, and tonight's one of the worse ones because I've got a girl on my mind, where I realize how desperate I am for a relationship because I feel like I'm only half a man. I'm at the age group where it's all gotta be about sex and I've got no experience so I'm out. It's hard to meet people and I have a talent for finding girls who have boyfriends or I'm not around long enough to get anywhere with. That was the downside of College, at least for me. My head says I don't want this girl at my game shop, I'm just so pathetic I'll cling to anything with boobs. I could have, should have, gotten dates in High School and College and been in relationships but I didn't. I wasn't. Now I'm home for the sixteenth month in a row and my world's gotten small again.

I'll never find anyone so why should I bother living? Because I have to. Life is sad and miserable and you don't get to check out early. So I'll get to live my life alone with no way out. Boy I can't wait until tomorrow.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
Hey hey hey, I'm not trying to put ANY negativity on wearing Yoga pants. No no no. I beg of you to continue to wear them. If that's what it looks like I'm sorry and that's not what I mean. What I hope to say is that women have the power to grab the attention of a specific crowd of men JUST by wearing something. How you decide to use that power is up to you. I just find it agitating when women put labels on all men based on their own experiences with them, and I'm using the power of clothing as a primary example of why a girl may be attracting multiple men with the same motives and personalities. If you want a different type of man, the power of clothing is a thing of beauty.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
Personally I don't think there's anything sexier than a woman that covers up. I don't mean wear a huge black robe and veil, but covering up the goods is essential to me. Because I already find it attractive. If I were to go out with someone who likes wearing booty shorts and a size -3 white tees 4 out of 7 days a week, then I would have a problem because, you're mine now honey, those goods are for me and only me, and now that you have someone that loves you you shouldn't feel the need to show off to anybody, because the only attention you need is from me, and you already have it in full.
 

Lady Imp

Rabid Wolverine
Hey hey hey, I'm not trying to put ANY negativity on wearing Yoga pants. No no no. I beg of you to continue to wear them. If that's what it looks like I'm sorry and that's not what I mean. What I hope to say is that women have the power to grab the attention of a specific crowd of men JUST by wearing something. How you decide to use that power is up to you. I just find it agitating when women put labels on all men based on their own experiences with them, and I'm using the power of clothing as a primary example of why a girl may be attracting multiple men with the same motives and personalities.

I said something similar about religion on my FB wall, and I think it rings true here as well (although imma clean up my language a bit here): I don't hate you because you're a guy, I hate you because you're a jerk. Not like, YOU you Gunn, but a guy in general. I've dated a bunch of D-bags, even married one once, but I was still convinced that out there somewhere was a nice guy who was actually gonna understand me and get it. Turned out he was already in my friend circle, so guys, don't sit there and think that the friendzone is the end-all of everything.

Which is something that kinda makes me headdesk, is when I hear guys whining about how they're always friendzoned. Okay, first off, the friendzone works two ways. As a matter of fact, I will admit to being mildly hurt when a guy who friendzoned me got married. Second, when guys bitch about how girls always put them in the friendzone is somewhat analogous to when girls complain that guys are always dicks, and to those nice guys I say the same thing: you just haven't found the right chick. But I wouldn't recommend ditching those girls either, cause while they keep coming and crying on your shoulder cause they're stupid and another D-bag ran off with the crack whore down the street, keep in mind that the next time some skank stomps on your heart with a pair of stilettos you just might be calling her up as well. The friendzone is a two-way street here.
 

Simus

An Excellent Site Member
Hmm...you know Gun, they sounds a bit chauvinistic. Even though it's not because I know exactly where you're coming from. I like my women covered up too. Makes them look...respectable. Samy way most women like a guy who wears a shirt that fits rather than one where his burger belly hangs out.
 

Lady Imp

Rabid Wolverine
Personally I don't think there's anything sexier than a woman that covers up. I don't mean wear a huge black robe and veil, but covering up the goods is essential to me. Because I already find it attractive. If I were to go out with someone who likes wearing booty shorts and a size -3 white tees 4 out of 7 days a week, then I would have a problem because, you're mine now honey, those goods are for me and only me, and now that you have someone that loves you you shouldn't feel the need to show off to anybody, because the only attention you need is from me, and you already have it in full.

Well, that's good, cause winter is coming ;)
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
I really hope things work out for you Gun, and you Keely. I don't think they will for me. I've got a girl on my mind myself and I really like spending time with her and everybody else at Friday Night Magic. I don't want to be friend-zoned but It'll turn to crap if I try anything else. It always does. The only girl I've ever been with was a week of unbelievable happiness and months of miserable long-distance and a breakup-sparked depression that got worse by the month. She was insane and I was too puppy-eyed to see it. I've never forgiven myself for being so blind and that was four years ago. Any other love interests I've had have been unrequited and with girls I no longer speak to as a result. I'm 24 years old, I did 5 years of college and I've never had a real, stable, steady girl. I don't know what it means to be in a relationship and I've never had sex. I don't even have a job and I'll never be able to drive without a new pair of eyes. There are nights, and tonight's one of the worse ones because I've got a girl on my mind, where I realize how desperate I am for a relationship because I feel like I'm only half a man. I'm at the age group where it's all gotta be about sex and I've got no experience so I'm out. It's hard to meet people and I have a talent for finding girls who have boyfriends or I'm not around long enough to get anywhere with. That was the downside of College, at least for me. My head says I don't want this girl at my game shop, I'm just so pathetic I'll cling to anything with boobs. I could have, should have, gotten dates in High School and College and been in relationships but I didn't. I wasn't. Now I'm home for the sixteenth month in a row and my world's gotten small again.

I'll never find anyone so why should I bother living? Because I have to. Life is sad and miserable and you don't get to check out early. So I'll get to live my life alone with no way out. Boy I can't wait until tomorrow.

Those are some pretty bold words to say for someone who is 24 years old. You'll never find anyone? You'll live your life alone? You're going to be alone if you keep your thoughts to yourself. They're not going to know how you feel until you tell them, whether it be straight up or hinting until they understand it. Relationships are never going to be Fate like you see in those corny romance comedies. It takes one person making a move. I'm sorry you feel the way you feel, I can see where you are coming from and I would share my thoughts and words of encouragement, but I think your situation is different than the one I was in, am in, and what I'm used to. Gah I want to help.
 

Lady Imp

Rabid Wolverine
You always find Mr/Miss Right when and where you least expect it. Like sitting in the parking lot of your work. Waiting for you to get out. Bribing you with Timbits.

All of Lord Imp's heinous awkwardness and creepiness aside, it'll happen. Just go about living. Cause life is way more awesome than the bad times make it out to be. So enjoy the warm rains and the sparkling snows and the thunder and the lightning cause it's super erotic cause while they are considered to be bad things, they're really fabulous.
 

Simus

An Excellent Site Member
No, our situations aren't so different. I'm in a mood right now, this isn't how I feel from day to day. There isn't much you can do Gun except listen and advise, and you've done that. It's just that I feel "past my prime". I feel weak, unwanted. Finding a girl isn't so different than looking for a job really. I'll never realize either if I give up. This is why this sucks. My head and heart are out of sync. I know what to do, but it's hard and it scares me. I've been hurt deeply in the past and don't want that again, but that's the risk I have to take. I'm so naive though, so inexperienced. I feel like I'm so far behind I'll never catch up.
 

Gunnbjorn

Formerly known as Arillious
Hey hey hey, I'm not trying to put ANY negativity on wearing Yoga pants. No no no. I beg of you to continue to wear them. If that's what it looks like I'm sorry and that's not what I mean. What I hope to say is that women have the power to grab the attention of a specific crowd of men JUST by wearing something. How you decide to use that power is up to you. I just find it agitating when women put labels on all men based on their own experiences with them, and I'm using the power of clothing as a primary example of why a girl may be attracting multiple men with the same motives and personalities.

I said something similar about religion on my FB wall, and I think it rings true here as well (although imma clean up my language a bit here): I don't hate you because you're a guy, I hate you because you're a jerk. Not like, YOU you Gunn, but a guy in general. I've dated a bunch of D-bags, even married one once, but I was still convinced that out there somewhere was a nice guy who was actually gonna understand me and get it. Turned out he was already in my friend circle, so guys, don't sit there and think that the friendzone is the end-all of everything.

Which is something that kinda makes me headdesk, is when I hear guys whining about how they're always friendzoned. Okay, first off, the friendzone works two ways. As a matter of fact, I will admit to being mildly hurt when a guy who friendzoned me got married. Second, when guys bitch about how girls always put them in the friendzone is somewhat analogous to when girls complain that guys are always dicks, and to those nice guys I say the same thing: you just haven't found the right chick. But I wouldn't recommend ditching those girls either, cause while they keep coming and crying on your shoulder cause they're stupid and another D-bag ran off with the crack whore down the street, keep in mind that the next time some skank stomps on your heart with a pair of stilettos you just might be calling her up as well. The friendzone is a two-way street here.

I've written three different posts as a response and didn't know where I was going with any of them but I was arguing against your claim, so I'm just going to say No.
 

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