Your WTF/LOL Moments?

imaginepageant said:

Posted this in the "Wow" thread because I forgot this thread existed!

After confronting Bersi Honey-Hand about his debt to Brynjolf, he gladly paid up, and I left the Pawned Prawn. But he followed me out, and started running. Curious, I followed. He went right to Edda, the beggar, and stopped in front of her. She asked if he could spare any coin, and he said, "Here you go, dear." And then he left.

In over three years of playing this game, I've never seen an NPC give gold to a beggar.

I feel really, really badly about all the times I wrecked Bersi's vase now.

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How cool is that?! I've never seen anything like that happen.


Edit to add two moments that happened to me today:

1. You know Cracked Tusk Keep, right? The fort in Falkreath that's full of Orc bandits whose leader is the "dangerous marauder" named Ghunzul? Well, I went to that fort today, to get a certain quest item, and to my utter bewilderment ran into a female Redguard Ghunzul!

2. I was just passing the Western Watchtower on my way to the Reach to get another certain quest item, when one of the guards at the tower randomly started shooting at me with his crossbow. His fellows just did the "A fight!" routine and ran away from the scene.

Whats up with this bench :O


skyrim electric chair?

Did a quick run from upstairs in my Solitude house down to the basement and out the door, jumping over the steps backwards, being goofy, all in one move. Opened the door and....

... proceeded to fall right down through the world to the beach below Solitude, instantly killing me. The auto reload was the same. I could turn a bit in the air before i hit the ground. tried to Shout, etc... but couldn't do anything.

Every time was death. Pretty interesting.

Ok.
1) Wandering Solstheim in werewolf form, runs into wall. Is immediately telported so far south, into the sea, PAST THE BORDER, that is says, "You cannot go that way" when I move at all.

2) I got the Wabbajack, and used it on a wolf. The wolf turned into a lady.... watch this video.
I didn't make this, but it's what happened.

3) Fighting Alduin with a fork because all my weapons except "Fork" went into Miscellaneous.

4) Discovering the non-Eclidian geometry of Apocrypha.

5) Attacking and killing most in the Companions in werewolf form. Farkas then followed me with his weapon out, entered talk mode, and said, "Getting tired of hangin round talkin all day." He proceeded to do so for 4 days in game, despite the fact I was frequently yielding.

6) Finding Sinderion's body in Blackreach. Sinderion was alive, and gave you the quest "Seeking Your Roots" in Oblivion, and appears dead, mentioning the Oblivion character in his field journal, in the quest "A Return To Your Roots". Coincidence, much?

7) Finding the book "A Guide to Better Thieving", which was, in lore, WRITTEN BY THE OBLIVION CHARACTER.

Defending Winterhold from the magic worm snake thingeys, when one of my fellow mages decided that the right strategy to thwart the attack would be to raise a fallen chicken from the dead. naturally, victory was ours, all thanks to our mighty ally.

I remember one time in Forsworn territory Serana and I had three Forsworn, a Revered Dragon and a bunch of mudcrabs attacking at the same time. Lying on the ground next to each other was the world's unluckiest chicken and a Forsworn Ravenger. Guess which one Serana thought would be more help to us? Arise, my undead poultry minion and lay waste to our enemies! But I forgave her because a chicken filled with bloodlust sprinting towards a fight was one of the funniest things I've ever seen in this game.

I was having trouble pickpocketing the visiting advisor on account of my low pickpocket skill and the fact Riften is full of watching people. So I lurked in the area behind the thrones and decided to sneak shot him with my crossbow when the guard had gone. I failed because a bottle of Alto Wine was in the way. It went flying off the table into the corner.

I got beheaded. If it wasn't for the kill cam looking so damned cool I would have been horrified.

Anyway my big WTF moment came last night. I did the hideously tedious quest for Dawnstar only because I wanted to get the Pale house. It suited my current character nicely. So after dying once and having to start the quest all over again I finally finished it. Helped the robed dude destroy the Skull of Corruption.
I hurried back to Dawnstar and spoke to the Jarl.. Nothing....
WTF??? He doesn't give me the dialogue to make me Thane and buy the land. Huh... Wait up.. Ill go help your people..! *runs out door* be back in a minute!!
So I go get the ring from Forsaken Cave... Fighting off Ice Wraith and Draugr and that angry dead dude.. Oh and I collect the white Phial.. bonus! I hand over the book to the smith and then run back to the Jarl's house... STILL NOTHING! WAH! I don't know what to do... I refuse to go to an old load.. I will loose hours of play. So I have resigned myself to moving to moldy old Morthal. Next character.....

Started a new game yesterday.

At the point I can choose Ralof or Hadvar, I stopped a second and though about going with who would yield the best haul to sell afterwards. At which point, Alduin landed riught by me. he then shouted at me. i went flying. Right into the door Ralof weas standing by. And it loaded up the next screen. Guess that's my choice then!

Brofski said:

Started a new game yesterday.

At the point I can choose Ralof or Hadvar, I stopped a second and though about going with who would yield the best haul to sell afterwards. At which point, Alduin landed riught by me. he then shouted at me. i went flying. Right into the door Ralof weas standing by. And it loaded up the next screen. Guess that's my choice then!

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Bound to be a Stormcloak

I had a bounty in Whiterun from killing the meat merchant for the Dark Brotherhood. However I thought it would be nice to return Amren's father's sword to him. I used an invisibility potion inside the gates and made my way to Amren. Once I stood up, I engaged dialogue with him which resulted in him thanking me.

He said "Here, let me show you a few sword and shield techniques." I was happy until he and the guards turned hostile and after which he stabbed me through the chest with the weapon I just gave him! When he was done with the animation and my vision growing dark, the last words I could make out were...

"What a waste....."

Brofski said:

Started a new game yesterday.

At the point I can choose Ralof or Hadvar, I stopped a second and though about going with who would yield the best haul to sell afterwards. At which point, Alduin landed riught by me. he then shouted at me. i went flying. Right into the door Ralof weas standing by. And it loaded up the next screen. Guess that's my choice then!

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Imperial gear is worth a lot more than Stormcloak junk gear.

Serana asked if there was anyone in my life. I said there's my husband. She said; "You're married? I had no idea."

Um, Serana, you see this ring I never take off? And you know that guy I keep telling to bring the children to whichever location out of Honeyside, Lakeview Manor and Heljarchen Hall is closest to whatever quest we are doing? The guy who keeps giving me money and cooking my meals? The guy who has called me my love in your hearing on numerous occasions? The guy who shares a bed with me and gives me lover's comfort? The one you've met about ten times now?

That's the guy I'm married to. How could you not have had any idea I was married? Your parents really did have a screwed up marriage didn't they? Or did you think he was some servant I kept around for his pretty face? Please tell me you didn't think he was my man-whore.

Sorry for the double post, but this is a serious WTF for me. I set Fastred up with Klimmek, also known as the one who doesn't say 'what a boring conversation' every time I talk to him, so Bassianus, also known as the jerk I never set Fastred up with, moved back to Riften. He then perished in a vampire attack so I decided to grieve in what Christopher Livingstone calls the traditional Tamriel fashion: by stripping the dead jerk of everything he owned and leaving his naked body where it fell.

Bassianus had the key to Klimmek's house on him. I find that seriously disturbing. Why did he have the key to the home of his victorious rival of love? Is that silly tramp Fastred still trying to fool around with both me? Or was Bassianus planning to go back and get some revenge on the woman who left him and her new lover? Sheesh, maybe those vampires did Ivarstead's lovebirds a real service.

My current character joined the Companions. Her first job, "Trouble in Whiterun" was so go rough up Danica Pure-Spring. I seriously didn't want to go bitch-slap the priestess. But slap her I did and then things got weird. Normally your victim fights back.. but Danica ran away...
Outside the temple.
WTH?
So naturally I took off after her. I follow her quest marker and she is down the stairs that lead to the Temple of the Dead. She is cowering there saying things like "I cannot best you!" and I have to start the quest dialogue all over again. Then the slapping ensues but the bitch pulls a knife on me! And she is vicious! I am taking serious damage. I am unarmed, trying to punch this frenzied woman into submission.
WTH indeed!
Eventually I must have knocked her one too many times as she goes down and submits. Finally. Geez, who had of thought that sweet healer was such a psychopath?

So as I said on another thread already (I believe?), I've been replaying the Dawnguard DLC on my main character, Serah Estiph, the sneaky battlemage, due to bugs from playing on the vampire side. So this time I've had her play through it from the Dawnguard side. Anyway, I'm at the part where I'm going through the Soul Cairn again. I'm not sure if it's because I'm now playing on Expert versus playing on Novice-Adept before, but things are different this time around. My first wtf/lol moment was with Serana in the Soul Cairn. Well as most of you know, she has a habit of mocking people or doing certain things she shouldn't, for example picking up a broom and sweeping out a dungeon after clearing it out. Which actually happened on my last playthrough. lol
This time though it happened when I was getting the quest to get Arvak's skull from the ghost NPC. She actually stood next to the NPC, with her hand up to her forehead in the whole searching motion, while I was still talking to him at that. Before she did this she had gotten stuck on some steps by the Soul Cairn entrance, to the point I had to Fus Ro Dah her off of them. She ran into the ghost NPC three times head on before helping him search, so to speak. Lord Almighty, I love Serana and all, but I had forgotten what a pain she can be. Hilarious sometimes, but still a pain. Maybe it's from having been asleep for so long.. Who knows? Maybe she just has severe ADHD.. I know how that feels. lol

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Not exactly brand new, but riding Shadowmere straight down a vertical mountain. And not sliding or tripping off of said vertical mountain. WTF?! I, sorry, we, should be dead. But we're not. . . .

dunklunk said:

Not exactly brand new, but riding Shadowmere straight down a vertical mountain. And not sliding or tripping off of said vertical mountain. WTF?! I, sorry, we, should be dead. But we're not. . . .

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I've done that before. Always figured Shadowmere had suction cups hidden on her (his?) hooves, being a master assassins guilds' horse and all. lol


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"He hasn't been ridden nearly as much as he should lately."- Astrid

Shadowmere's a he.

Vicente Valtiere said:

Shadowmere's a he.

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I believe so, but it was referred to as female in Oblivion, and the Spectral Assasin confirms that they are the same horse. So overall I'd wager that Shadowmere has no discernable gender, rather than assuming that one or both owners were incorrect when assigning the horse a gender.

On a related subject, I have just done Breylna's project quest again- turning into a horse never gets old.